I’m going to start a line of awkward cards.
Choice card captions include:
“I know you’re a friend but I accidentally wound up finding myself attracted to you.”
“We all have problems in life. So stop whining, because yours are stupid.”
“Let’s just skip all the sexual tension and go straight to the sex.”
“It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I like too many other [women/men] and can’t choose.”
“You’re cool and all, but honestly I just stop listening to you after a while when you talk too much.”
“Happy [celebratory event]! I know you consider me one of your best acquaintances, which is why I hope you’ll forgive me that I forgot about today and didn’t get you anything.”